The Blog
De-escalation is a Neurodivergent Access Need
This article explores how traditional crisis response systems often fail neurodivergent people by waiting until visible distress occurs, rather than offering proactive, affirming support. It emphasizes that de-escalation should be recognized as a neurodivergent access need, grounded in trauma-informed care and early intervention. The piece calls for a shift toward environments that prioritize regulation, safety, and autonomy to prevent harm before it happens.
How Ableism Sees the Body: The Politics of Neurodivergent Movement and Expression
This article examines how neurodivergent people are routinely judged and pathologized based on their body language, tone, posture, and expression through a neurotypical lens. It explores how societal norms pressure autistic and ADHD individuals to perform "acceptable" versions of themselves, often at the expense of their comfort, authenticity, and well-being. The piece calls for a radical shift away from ableist expectations toward a world that respects neurodivergent embodiment as valid, meaningful, and worthy of inclusion without condition.
Why Neurotypical Empathy Isn’t the Gold Standard
This article challenges the assumption that neurotypical expressions of empathy are inherently superior, highlighting how autistic and neurodivergent people often experience and express empathy in different but equally valid ways. It explores the emotional depth, ethical commitment, and unique communication styles that characterize neurodivergent empathy, while exposing the ableist bias in how empathy is culturally defined and measured. The piece calls for a broader, more inclusive understanding of empathy that honors diverse ways of connecting, caring, and being human.
The Politics of Being ‘Too Much’: Autistic Intensity and Cultural Policing of Passion
Autistic people are often told they are “too much” for expressing passion, emotion, or deep interest, leading to shame and self-suppression. This article challenges the cultural norms that pathologize autistic intensity and reframes it as a powerful and authentic way of engaging with the world. It calls for a shift away from emotional policing toward honoring neurodivergent expression as valid, necessary, and deeply human.
Unmasking the Body: Why So Many of Us Don’t Know What We Physically Feel
Many neurodivergent people, especially those who are autistic, struggle to recognize internal bodily signals like hunger, pain, or emotional cues due to differences in interoception, past trauma, and years of masking their true selves. This disconnection from the body is often a survival response to environments that have invalidated or punished their natural expressions and needs. Reconnecting with the body is a gradual, healing process that involves rebuilding trust in one's internal experience and reclaiming the right to feel and respond authentically.
We Are Not Your Project: Autistic People Deserve Relationships, Not Fixers
This article explores how autistic people are often treated as self-improvement projects by partners, therapists, and family members, rather than being accepted as whole, complex individuals. It critiques the ways in which support becomes conditional on progress or compliance with neurotypical norms, leading to harm, disconnection, and internalized shame. The piece calls for relationships rooted in mutual respect, consent, and radical acceptance—where autistic people are not fixed, but genuinely seen and valued.
Grieving the Years You Lost to Not Knowing You Were Autistic
This article explores the unique grief that many late-diagnosed autistic adults experience as they come to understand how much of their lives were shaped by not knowing their true neurodivergent identity. It reflects on the relationships, opportunities, and self-understanding that were lost or distorted due to years of masking, misdiagnosis, and internalized shame. Through this grief, the article also offers space for healing, self-recognition, and the possibility of reclaiming a more authentic life.
Disordered or Disabled or Neither: Questioning the Pathologizing Language of Diagnosis
This article challenges the deficit-based language used in clinical diagnoses of autism and ADHD, which often frames neurodivergent people as disordered rather than different. It explores the tension between needing a diagnosis for access and support while resisting the harmful impacts of pathologizing frameworks. The piece advocates for affirming, context-aware understandings of neurodivergence that center lived experience, dignity, and agency.
The Neurodivergent Sabbatical: What It Means to Step Away to Save Yourself
This article explores the concept of a neurodivergent sabbatical as a vital act of self-preservation for autistic and ADHD adults facing burnout from masking, overwork, and systemic inaccessibility. It distinguishes the sabbatical from a vacation, describing it as a necessary pause that often arises from collapse rather than choice, allowing space for unmasking, rest, and reconnection with self. The piece challenges productivity culture and calls for a collective reimagining of rest as resistance, care, and a reclaiming of worth outside of output.
Beyond the Diagnosis: Navigating Internalized Pathology After Labels
This article explores the ongoing process neurodivergent adults face after receiving a diagnosis, particularly the challenge of unlearning internalized shame and pathology. While a diagnosis can be validating, it does not erase years of being misunderstood, punished, or framed as broken by systems rooted in deficit-based thinking. True healing begins when neurodivergent people move beyond clinical labels to reclaim their identities, unmask safely, and build affirming narratives rooted in community, authenticity, and self-acceptance.
Burnout vs. Depression: How Misdiagnosis Hurts Neurodivergent People
This article explains the critical differences between clinical depression and neurodivergent burnout, highlighting how the two are often confused in autistic and ADHD adults. While depression is typically an internal mood disorder, burnout stems from chronic masking, sensory overwhelm, and environmental mismatch. Misdiagnosis can lead to ineffective treatment and delay true recovery, making accurate recognition essential for healing and self-understanding.
Neurodivergence and Moral Injury: When the System Forces Us to Betray Ourselves
This article explores how moral injury affects neurodivergent adults who have been pressured to conform to systems that deny their values, needs, and identities. It explains that masking, compliance, and chronic self-betrayal—often required to survive in education, workplaces, and social environments—can lead to deep emotional harm and disconnection from the self. Naming this as moral injury allows for healing through self-compassion, community, and reclaiming alignment with one’s true neurodivergent identity.
Microaggressions That Erase Our Neurodivergent Identity
This article offers neurodiversity-affirming scripts to respond to common microaggressions that autistic and otherwise neurodivergent people frequently encounter. Each response is designed to validate identity, challenge harmful assumptions, and reduce the emotional labor often required to defend one’s neurodivergence. The piece emphasizes that no one owes an explanation for their identity and that protecting one’s boundaries and well-being always comes first.
When You’re the First Neurodivergent Person You’ve Ever Known
This article explores the emotional journey of discovering you're neurodivergent later in life, especially when you grew up without language, validation, or community for your differences. It examines the deep loneliness, internalized shame, and self-doubt that can result from being the first neurodivergent person you’ve ever known, and the complex process of healing that follows. Through reflection, grief, and connection, late-identified autistic and ADHD adults can begin to reclaim their stories and rebuild lives rooted in self-trust and belonging.
What Is Autistic Inertia? Understanding One of Autism’s Most Misunderstood Experiences
Autistic inertia refers to the difficulty many autistic people experience when starting, stopping, or transitioning between tasks, even when they want to. It can feel like being stuck in place—unable to begin something important or unable to disengage from a flow state—often leading to shame, overwhelm, and misunderstanding. Recognizing inertia as a valid neurodivergent experience helps us approach it with compassion, create supportive strategies, and reduce the emotional toll it can take on daily life.
Why ‘Radical Acceptance’ Might Be the Key to Thriving as a Neurodivergent Adult
Radical acceptance invites neurodivergent adults to stop fighting against who we are and instead embrace our brains, needs, and experiences without judgment. It offers a path to healing by challenging internalized ableism, redefining success, and allowing rest, authenticity, and self-trust. Through this practice, we can begin to build lives that reflect our true selves and create space where we can thrive rather than simply survive.
“But You Don’t Seem Autistic”: Breaking Stereotypes & Misconceptions About Autistic Women (3/24/25 Keynote Address at Stockton University)
This article features the full text of Bridgette Hamstead’s keynote address, “But You Don’t Seem Autistic”: Breaking Stereotypes & Misconceptions About Autistic Women, delivered at Stockton University’s Neurodiversity Education and Celebration Day. It explores the harmful effects of outdated autism stereotypes, the emotional toll of masking, and the often invisible struggles of late-diagnosed autistic women and nonbinary individuals. The keynote calls for greater recognition, representation, and belief in autistic experiences—especially those that don’t fit traditional expectations.
Sensory Trauma: Understanding the Lasting Impact of Sensory Overload
Sensory trauma occurs when repeated or intense sensory overload overwhelms the nervous system, leaving lasting emotional, physical, and psychological impacts on neurodivergent individuals. These experiences, often dismissed or misunderstood by others, can lead to heightened sensitivity, avoidance behaviors, and difficulty trusting one's own needs. Healing from sensory trauma involves creating safe environments, validating sensory responses, and building a life that honors and protects our sensory experiences with compassion and care.
Autistic Burnout Recovery 2.0: Beyond Rest—What’s Next?
Autistic burnout recovery goes far beyond rest; it involves rebuilding a life that honors our neurodivergent needs, energy limits, and authentic selves. Recovery requires examining the systems, environments, and expectations that led to burnout in the first place, while gently reintroducing structure, connection, and joy. With support, self-compassion, and a shift toward sustainable living, we can move beyond mere survival and begin to thrive in ways that feel aligned and restorative.
Masking Is Not a Social Skill—It’s a Survival Mechanism
Masking is not a social skill but a survival mechanism that autistic and ADHD individuals develop to navigate a world that does not accommodate their natural ways of being. While masking helps avoid rejection and punishment, it comes at a significant cost to mental health, identity, and relationships, often leading to chronic burnout, anxiety, and a sense of disconnection from oneself. Unmasking is a gradual process of self-acceptance, setting boundaries, and finding spaces where authenticity is safe, allowing neurodivergent individuals to build lives that align with who they truly are rather than who they are expected to be.